Thoughts Turned to Doubts

This last weekend I traveled in the car for twelve hours in just a 48 hour span. I was awake for 36 hours straight and was taken away with my thoughts. At first these thoughts were pleasing and positive. The adoption process was going to be smooth. We would be blessed with a child quickly and all of our hard work and pain would be replaced with immense and immediate joy. We talked and dreamed of all of the possibilities.

Decorating a nursery.

Names.

What state our baby would come from.

Race.

Then interrupted and short sleep came and the thoughts turned to doubts and fears. I had bad dreams all weekend long. Nothing ever went right.

No baby.

Wasted money.

Heartbreak.

My thoughts became irrational and I had to finally step away from the ideas for a while. Fully rested, the hopes are now back and we are on track. As soon as next week, we will have more updates about our progress through Phase I. (I never get sick of saying those words... Phase I-because it means we are actually somewhere in the process, and progress-because it makes us feel like we are doing all that we can do.) The one thing I think we will learn from this immense undertaking is the necessity of patience because without it, I'm sure to drive myself irrevocably insane.

Any ideas on how to keep my thoughts in check?